Dining Around The Culinary Capital of Kelowna (A Travvelsized Odyssey)

Despite the amount of time I spent at Kelowna General Hospital around my pie-baking adventure, I quickly came to realize that hospital food wasn’t exactly giving me the full taste of what the city had to offer.

The food gods demanded salmon!

The food gods demanded salmon!

But I was only providing offerings of strangely coloured mush with a side of strangely colourless mush!

But I was only providing offerings of strangely coloured mush with a side of strangely colourless mush!

I mean, the almighty food gods would definitely smite me for eating nothing but mush in the home of the culinary champions of 2011 – 2015.

 According to the “Welcome to Kelowna” sign, anyhow

According to the “Welcome to Kelowna” sign, anyhow

In order to appease the wise and powerful food gods, I decided to show my devotion (read: eat) at a variety of their temples (read: restaurants) – a brave and honourable task, I know!

Since I starting out in such an unfavourable position in the eyes of the gods, I needed to start my path to salvation in their mecca: RauDZ.

One of the most sacred temples of food god worship

One of the most sacred temples of food god worship

As the top rated restaurant in Kelowna, the gods were certain to appreciate my prayers for Ken’s mushrooms, the ‘RJB’ and the daily salmon special.

From the name and the delicious taste, I can only presume the “Ken” for whom this plate is named is one of the higher food gods

From the name and the delicious taste, I can only presume the “Ken” for whom this plate is named is one of the higher food gods

Grilled beef tenderloin, poached crab AND cured bacon, all in one burger! (The gods were quite pleased!)

Grilled beef tenderloin, poached crab AND cured bacon, all in one burger! (The gods were quite pleased!)

The gods would finally receive what they truly desired!

The gods would finally receive what they truly desired!

With all of this love for the food gods, it would have been rude to completely ignore the drink gods now! To keep them appeased (as if my last post wasn’t enough), offerings of Lavender Bees Knees and Rose Coloured Glasses were made.

You know the drinks are going to be a sugar-coma of deliciousness because they have names that don’t really have anything to do with what’s actually in them

You know the drinks are going to be a sugar-coma of deliciousness because they have names that don’t really have anything to do with what’s actually in them

While this level of devoted worship is usually enough to appease even the snobbiest foodie food god, I was digging my way out of a mushy trench (see the first photo of the post) and would need a Crazy Good act of devotion to prove my loyalty, so I decided to head to Smack Dab (which I was a bit dubious about, considering their slogan was “Crazy Good Food”, I mean, McDonald’s slogan is I’m Lovin’ It and they’re definitely no where near my most beloved restaurant).

However, there was no room for doubt as the food gods commanded my worship and attention. I began with an offering of Spinach & Artichoke Dip For Two and must say this was a bit of mis-nomer, it should really be called Spinach & Artichoke Dip For Two Snorlaxes Or Two Hundred People.

Here’s a comparative size chart for the dip, keeping in mind that Snorlax weighs 1014lbs

Here’s a comparative size chart for the dip, keeping in mind that Snorlax weighs 1014lbs

After persevering through, mains were ordered, stomachs were filled (to bursting) and the food gods were finally appeased.

Can't say no to some good ol' Crispy Steelhead Trout!

Can’t say no to some good ol’ Crispy Steelhead Trout!

... or some Prosciutto Di Parma Pizza

… or some Prosciutto Di Parma Pizza

My long and rigorous odyssey had finally come to a successful closing and while the food gods had permitted me to go back to munching on mush, the adventure proved to be enough to keep my foodie levels peaked for the remainder of the trip.

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4 thoughts on “Dining Around The Culinary Capital of Kelowna (A Travvelsized Odyssey)

  1. Pingback: College Tourist Global Writer’s Roundup | The College Tourist

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